How individuality matters more than equality

Suppose someone is a champion of equality and is seeking a life-partner. Will they just look at the teeming mass of humanity and pick up anyone because, after all, everyone is equal? Certainly not; they will carefully look for someone compatible. 

Are they being unreasonable? No. Because people are different; they have their individual personalities — their qualities, abilities and interests that makes them who they are. And not everyone can get along equally well with everyone else. 

That’s why even when we intuitively believe that everyone is equal, we don’t and can’t treat everyone equally as a potential life-partner. The Bhagavad-gita (15.07) points to the dual components of our present personality when it declares that we have a spiritual core that is a part of the Divine and we have a material shell that is composed of our body and mind. Our present personality is a complex mesh of our spiritual and material sides. We all are meant to grow in our particular way so that we can become who we are meant to be. And the same applies to others. 

Through our relationships, we are meant to help each other grow and find shared satisfaction along the journey. We would like as a partner someone whose personality gels in some way with ours — we may be unlike in a way that attracts and complements each other or we may be alike in a way that attracts and reinforces the good in each other or we may seek some other specific dynamic that helps us bond well with each other

Therefore, even when we appreciate everyone’s inherent equality, we also recognize the diversity of different people’s personalities and choose the relationships that nourish our and others’ individuality.

One-sentence summary:

Respecting equality shouldn’t lead to denying individual personality — equality is meant to help express individuality, not to suppress individuality. 

Think it over:

  • When choosing a relationship, why don’t people treat everyone equally?
  • How can our relationships function constructively?
  • How can our respect for equality be balanced with respect for individuality?


15.07: The living entities in this conditioned world are My eternal fragmental parts. Due to conditioned life, they are struggling very hard with the six senses, which include the mind.


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  1. So wonderful and sweet Prabhu. Thank you for your unlimited wisdom and inspiration.

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